My experience with bulimia – a poem

When I’m stressed

When I’m depressed

When I’m overwhelmed

When I’m tired

When I’m wired

Used to hide

Now back by my side

Evil surrounds it

The devil from within

Begging me to sin

Now I’ve had a bite must finish the rest

I think this whole thing was a test

I have definitely failed

Why can’t I rewind time

If I made a different decision now i’d be fine

What’s the harm in throwing up a chocolate bar

Forget about the teeth decay and knuckle scars

Now my chest is in constant pain

Filled with shame

I’m playing a dangerous game

I just want a quick fix

Lose weight fast, like you see on instagram pics

Something for a smaller waistline

Tried every diet under the sun

These fat loss plans aren’t any fun

It’s not just about appearances though

I’ve had low self esteem from the word go

Just want to feel some self control

Manage my nervousness

But I do it with foolishness

Don’t judge me for the way I deal with life

This constant stress cuts me with it’s knife

I can’t undo the actions I have done

I hate all the stigma that comes along

Kick that back to where it belongs

But I have got to take a different path

I’m done with the cleaning up and the aftermath

It’s never worth the harm

That short relief doesn’t last

Got to put this behaviour in the past

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2 thoughts on “My experience with bulimia – a poem

  1. Sounds like a trap, one that you know about but still has power and takes a lot of fight. I know that when you feel really bad it’s so hard not to take the quick fix just to feel better now, regardless of the consequences. Your health is very important, surround yourself with people that love you as you are.

    Liked by 1 person

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